The Need to Fight
Domestic violence is an age old epidemic that is runs rampant, even today. I know the picture to the left is a man abusing a woman but it is actually common for it to be the other way around. Men get abused too!
In some households children and the elderly are hurt, as well.
The reason why I chose this topic especially is because throughout my life, I have been physically, emotionally and verbally abused. It's hard to share, but maybe someone would read my words and they'll be inspired to question the way that they are treated.
The emotional/psychological abuse that I went through went something like this: my great-grandma fills the table with fried southern dishes and calorie slam-packed desserts and forces us to eat...until we (my sister and I) are about to pop. Then she backs away from the table and gets out her scale and measuring tape and precedes to measure my waistline at age 8 and my sister's at age 11. After telling us we are too big for our age, she makes us get on a scale. Shaking her head in dissapproval, she writes our weights down on an index card, used for just that occasion.
My physical abuse was actually from my grandmother whom I lived with for years and have just recently (November) moved away from. She and the rest of my family think that its okay to hit others who are younger than you, and weaker. From a very early age, I was spanked, and popped...all of the usual types of punishment until beatings would get worse and verbal abuse was at its highest. I was hit with switches, sticks, flyswatters, books, shoes, hands, and eventually fists. I would be constantly slapped or pinched for 'backtalking' and told that I 'deserved it' and "if you irritate someone enough, then they'll react".
The worst situations have happened in the past 2 years when i was punched in the face at least 4 times while driving....yeah i know that sounds funny.
but I'm being dead serious.
punching isnt cool!
Okay so i guess I'll get down to the point:
The root of physically hurting, calling names, picking on, criticizing, and screaming at a person is to belittle them and to make them submissive to a higher/authoratative power. First, this power breaks down his/her victims self-esteem, makes them start beleiving that they not worth alot, then the physical abuse begins....the goal of it all???? To control another human being. To feel the power, and the rush of excitement.
Some Information:
Why Does It Happen?
If you're one of the thousands of people living in an abusive situation, it can help to understand why some people abuse — and to realize that the violence is not your fault. Sometimes abusers manipulate the people they are abusing by telling them they did something wrong or "asked for it" in some way. But that's not true.
There is no single reason why people abuse others. But some factors seem to make it more likely that a person may become abusive.
Growing up in an abusive family is one factor. Other people become abusive because they're not able to manage their feelings properly. For example, someone who is unable to control anger or can't cope with stressful personal situations (like the loss of a job or marriage problems) may lash out at others inappropriately. Alcohol or drug use also can make it difficult for some people to control their actions.
Certain types of personality disorders or mental illness might also interfere with a person's ability to relate to others in healthy ways or cause people to have problems with aggression or self-control. Of course, not everyone with a personality disorder or mental illness becomes abusive.
Fortunately, abuse can always be corrected. Everyone can learn how to stop.
2 comments:
The role switch in abuse is ironically funny (not that abuse by any means is funny), but most people laugh or don't take seriously reported cases of a woman abusing a man. [i.e. the case of Liza Manelli and her recent ex-husband]
that's so true!
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